Natwerk Designs

What do you think of my story so far?

Nicholai Fisher was awoken at the ungodly hour of 5 in the morning. The past week had been crazy. She'd been attending movie premiers and after-parties all week long. She'd barely had anytime to sleep.The night before she had come home early and crashed at seven before she had the chance to eat inner. Nicky wondered why the alarm on her blackberry was going off. To her knowledge she had nothing going on today. Nicky threw the covers off of her and reached for the blackberry. The alarm was set at five for a six o'clock photoshoot for Elle Magazine and her agent had been calling her, non-stop, for the past hour. “Hello?” “Oh thank god you picked up,” her frantic manager went off. He rambled on. “Vanity Fair has a last-minute request that you would do an interview with Leo at six tonight. It fits in your schedule, so it's up to you if you want to do it or not.” “Uh, yeah, sure, I'll do it. She nodded even though Connor couldn't see her. “Great, and I'll have the car pick you up in a half hour,” he fasted talked, sounding as if he was having a major caffeine rush. Nicky powered down her phone and threw it on her bed, losing it somewhere in the sheets. After showering and brushing her hair, Nicky picked out her outfit carefully knowing that she would have to do the interview immediately after the shoot. She opted for a form-fitting black v-neck, dark washed skinny jeans and a grey suede jacket that felt good against her skin. In effort to look more sexy, Nicky put on a pair of 3-inch black ankle boots. Nicky still had eleven minutes left before the car would arrive. She gathered her cell phone, some make-up and her wallet and stuffed them all in her small white-leather hobo bag. Nicholai stood in front of her vanity for the last remaining minutes of freedom of the day. She studied her face. She still looked pretty without make-up. She had very thick, dark eyelashes, flawless skin and raspberry lips. In the mist of admiring her own beauty, Nicky heard the car beeping from outside. She ran down the stairs and into the March-Air of Beverly Hills. “Technically, I still have ten minutes,” she said jumping in the car next to Connor. “You're lucky I was ready.” “You're right babydoll,” her charming British agent confirmed. “But if you didn't have ten minutes then you wouldn't have this,” Connor pulled out a large coffee from behind his back. Nicky smiled with delight. “Light and sweet?” “Always.” Nicky grabbed the coffee out of his hand, and took a quick sip, thrilled by the burning sensation on her tongue. For the duration of the car ride Nicky and Connor were completely silent. Nicky gulped her coffee, letting the searing hot liquid burn her throat. Connor sat involved in his iphone. “Put your sunglasses on,” Connor grabbed a backpack as the limo came to a halt. He rushed out of the car, slamming the door shut quickly. Nicky slid her black-out aviators on her face. A ray of camera lights came streaming through Nicholai's vision as the door fell open. She swiftly hopped out of the car and grabbed Connor's arm as they dashed into the St. Regis hotel. The duo were rushed up the elevator by a man in the lobby. They were led to a presidential suite on the tenth floor. The gorgeous room was modernly decorated in charcoals and pastels. Camera and lighting equipment filled the luxurious space as well as a handful of people. “Hi, I'm Erin. It's so nice to meet you Miss Fisher. I'll be assisting you to your photoshoot today,” the petite blonde interrupted Nicky's observations. “Call me Nicky,” She smiled at Erin before whiping her head around to see that Connor was already sitting in a chair texting. “Shall we go to hair and make-up?” Erin offered. Nicky followed her though the suite to the large marble bathroom where hair, make-up and wardobe were set up.” Three complete strangers to Nicky stood at the vanity. ** I was on my third session of hair and make up and my energy was completely drained. We'd gone through two different looks. The first look was a very sexy lingerie look that was definitely not age appropriate but I didn't really care. I belive that I'm older than seventeen. The second look was really edgy and cool. I checked my phone to see that the male model involved in the shot had already texted me his number. I looked up from my phone to see that a tall man stood over me. “I was wondering,” he paused. “if I could get a quick interview with you for the magazine.” I shook my head at all this work that was put into the day. “Sure.” http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AoQccs4b5FwFNYxLGGn6jGjsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20101010063516AALWD97

Public Comments

1. u have a ton of grammar issues and u mite be able to spread the beginning out instaed of cramming it into that one parargraph but other than that the story is well written and the beginning draws u in
2. okay......the beginning of your story is at best ok. But then you cant really say anything at this point.....who knows this may turn out to be a best seller...?? It did not interest me much though. i'm not a fan of the subject either but then again you can twist and turn it anyway you want to make it a great story. Do you read Jackie Collins by any chance? coz this sounded lik something she would write about. Try reading her to get a little insight (tho m not a fan of her work either). Just remember, you have to be different from others to be appreciated. Be as innovative as possible!!