Natwerk Designs - What're Some Movie Cliches?

What're Some Movie Cliches?

I got this in an email some time back. Cracked me up! Any they forgot? 1. During all police investigations it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once. 2. All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555. 3. All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets which reach up to the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her. 4. The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No-one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty. 5. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do. 6. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds. 7. Kitchens don't have light switches. When entering a kitchen at night, you should open the fridge door and use that light instead. 8. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear. 9. Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames. 10. Wearing a vest or stripping to the waist can make a man invulnerable to bullets. 11. If you find yourself caught up in a misunderstanding that could be cleared up quickly with a simple explanation, for goodness sake, keep your mouth shut. 12. Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant. 13. During a car chase, a fruit stand will always get hit. 14. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off. 15. When in love, it is customary to burst into song. 16. When confronted by an evil international terrorist, sarcasm and wisecracks are your best weapons. 17. One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them than 20 men firing at 1 man. 18. Creepy music coming from a cemetery should always be investigated more closely. 19. If being fired at by Germans, hide in a river - or even a bath. German bullets are unable to penetrate water. 20. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization. 21. Freelance helicopter pilots are always eager to accept bookings from international terrorist organizations - even though the job will require them to shoot total strangers and will end in their own certain death as the helicopter explodes in a ball of flames. 22. Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper clippings - especially if any of their family or friends have died in a strange boating accident. 23. All computer disks will work in all computers, regardless of software. 24. Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite. 25. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other. 26. Action heroes never face charges for manslaughter or criminal damage despite laying entire cities to waste by their actions. 27. You can always find a chainsaw when you need one. 28. Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds - unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside. 29. You can tell if somebody is British because he will be wearing a bow tie. 30. When driving a car it is normal to look not at the road but at the person sitting beside you or in the back seat for the entire journey. 31. An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight year old child. 32. Having a job of any kind will make fathers forget their son's eighth birthday. 33. Honest and hard working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement. 34. If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert in Nuclear Fission at age 22. 35. The more a man and a woman hate each other, the more likely they will fall in love. I think they forgot- "When you're back is on fire, you must run in every direction 1st before dropping dead." Ben- LOL! SO true!

Public Comments

Every movie has a happy ending. No story can be too complex for the audience. The ending must unravel everything in a quick and simple manner.
What about, " The villain can never just kill the good guy. He has to explain what's going on, and then just assume his trap will kill the good guy" **** Oh, another thought.... How about how an electric fence strong enough to keep a T-rex out is not strong enough to kill a kid? Or how a T-rex (weighing a few tons) can step on a jeep with kids in it and not crush it! I hate Jurassic Park!!****
LOL, Thanks for this! Absolutley loved reading them! Being a Romantic Comedy fan 3 and 35 were my favoirites. But all were great and so true! Can't think of any they missed...
What about how you can get telephone reception everywhere? or that you shouldn't call the police when in danger, as it makes more sense to call your wife/girlfriend/etc.
When a bad guy is supposed to be dead (usually at the end), he/she finds some amazing power to attack again when nobody expects. Any Russian person in a movie is always connected with mafia.
When kicked in the nuts, the complete recovery takes no longer than 5 seconds at the most...
here are some I find annoying as well: If a flying vehicle runs out of fuel and crashes, it still explodes as if the tank were full Characters who survive a plane crash onto a desert island can go for weeks without bathing, get dragged through mud pits, battle with local wildlife and still come out with their hair and clothing looking professionally styled. In any movie that spends a considerable amount of time on an airplane, the pilot always gets killed. This means that someone with little flying experience has to land the plane. Although luckily enough, this person will just happen to have been taking flying lessons, although landing has always been toughest for him/her. (Worst example of this was Executive Decision.) Bars in movies don't need to make money. Anytime you see a scene in a bar, the bar nowhere near as busy as it needs to be in order to stay in business. The bartender always has time for long conversations with the patrons, to wash glasses, or to flip bottles in the air just for fun. Have you ever noticed, that no matter how long people were absent from home, they always have icecubes for their drinks in a cooler. Those cubes don't seem to melt away. Although the main character has been drinking for hours, he/she can still snap to do the most strenuous jobs in a matter of seconds (a la Independence Day) BODILY FUNCTIONS People never cough, sneeze, blow their noses, or show any other symptoms of being in less than perfect health. Only exception to the above is when they're dying. A cough is a symptom of terminal illness. Menstruation is an unknown phenomenon in movies. Female movie characters are all immune from it. You can eat as much as you want in a film and you'll never EVER have to go to the bathroom. Vomit is portrayed by distant toilet flush. Nobody ever throws-up on the carpet. COMPUTERS & ELECTRONICS Word processors never display a cursor. You never have to use the space-bar when typing long sentences. Movie character never make typing mistakes. All monitors display inch-high letters. High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or some such governmental institution, will have easy to understand graphical interfaces. - just to name a few. There are thousands! here's a good web site about famous movie cliche's: http://www.moviecliches.com/
25. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other. I was going to say that. No matter what time it is and how dark it is outside, when there are no lights on, everything will have a blue glow. If a woman thinks there are ghosts or there's somebody in her home, she must immediately strip naked and take a shower. No one in an action movie ever goes to the bathroom. Ever. No woman, in a movie that takes place over a long period of time, will ever get her period.
When you walk into a room and find a corpse, its best to run to the kitchen, grab a knife, and run back to the room. When you think a homicidal maniac is on a killing spree, its best to strip naked and take a shower for such a long amount of time that when you open the bathroom door, steam bellows out in huge waves. Find run-down home, move your entire extended family into it, find the indian burial ground it was built on, and pass off plates/knifes/crosses flying at your head from the other side of the room as wind. If a murderer is in your house, never go to the front door, it makes much more sense to run out the back door, into the forest, and to the shed that the murderer happens to live in. -Last but not least- Never, EVER call the police or relatives who live within 10 miles... Its best to call Aunt Sue, who you havent seen in 4 years and lives 2 hours away, so you can wait for her to help you with your little possesed-doll problem.
Throwing a lit cigarette onto spilled gasoline on the pavement always causes fire, then explosion. In real life, it would just put the cigarette out like it was water. At the begining of a movie the camera will zoom in onto some object that 'seems' to have nothing to do with what's been going on. Then at the end of the movie, that same object will show up again as a key-prop (usually to be used as a weapon but could be anything) lol